Tuesday, October 11, 2005
I need God...
“I stub out my cigarette, close the tent flaps, and lay back on the ground sheet on top of the soil. I close my eyes and prepare to sleep, but something underneath me nudges my spine. I reach my arms out of the flaps, into the rain, and underneath the ground sheet, where I pluck out a small object. I bring it back inside and feel it-it is a spruce pinecone. I smell it, cold and wet, and then hold it up to my cheek. I then stick my arm back outside the tent and plant the cone into the soil, just below the ground sheet.
Time is how the trees grow. I will fall asleep for a thousand years, and when I wake, a mighty spruce tree will have raised me up high, high into the sky….
Now-here is my secret:
I tell it to you with an openness of heart that I doubt I shall ever achieve again, so I pray that you are in a quiet room as you hear these words. My secret is that I need God-that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem to be capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyond being able to love.” ---Douglas Coupland, LIFE AFTER GOD